sad poem.

feel embarrassed and otherwise unmotivated by deep feelings of wanting to be appreciated

these feelings cause other feelings of wanting to believe there are things that are 'impossible' for the purpose of ignoring them

i.e. my capacity for world-wide acknowledgment and appreciation

when really the concept of 'impossible' is an existential imperative

used to put a boundary around the abstraction that is 'concrete reality'

while in 'concrete reality' nothing is 'impossible' because nothing that is 'impossible' can exists

i will develop something that large numbers of humans will be interested in and be fascinated by

and i will hate it, or maybe feel OK about it, or not know how to feel about it

and there will be millions of people who see it and will want to see it again

and i will show them again and repeatedly, until i need someone's help to show it to them

and then i will delegate control and distribution of this thing people look at

and eventually the people i delegate to will lose control

and the entire system and what i created will be atomized

and i will become depressed and inconsequential again

and then maybe someone will love me