feeling incapable of forming concrete ideas.

earth is a massive thing

earth is fucking enormous

enormous things scare me to little pieces of shit

feeling small and inconsequential doesn't do anything

if i could feel love for one person, everything would change

if one person had enough capacity to love me violently

i think the earth would spin faster

and the fucking enormous earth would become confused

and do impossible, unnatural things

like allow long moments of silence in certain places

and little children would go days without crying

and the panda population would go back to normal

i don't know if i believe in love

there are venomous animals and fungi everywhere

and every mouth i put my mouth on i get little germs i never had

is there something worth dying faster and more recklessly for

the same thing that happens when you divide an atom happens to people

i want a back that i can call mine

and can kiss whenever the mood hits me

a back with shoulder blades, a spinal column, and shoulders on either side