alienated but maybe feeling OK about it and only a little suicidal.

i saw you two days ago

where did you go?

i bought you a pacifier

for you to lace with drugs

but haven't seen you since thursday

i am sad

and feel unproductive

like there are a trillion assorted miniature zoo animals

falling from the existential plane above my head

and collecting in my ankle/wrist area

preventing me from walking anywhere or typing anything

i will defiantly walk out into the street

and smoke a cigarette, looking sophisticated and bohemian

and die

my corpse will combust spontaneously

and my neighbors will gather around the bonfire of my shell and say 'he was an alright guy'

and walk away with neutral facial expressions

continuing with their routines

which include cooking, watching television, reprimanding various children, and masturbating in their respective houses

as well as other places

given the right amount of privacy

i just died