i feel 'over-extended'
maybe i perceive reality how a remote control perceives a television
also, i have had four cups of coffee in the past ~1.5 hours
it seems that the most probable cause for myself is somehow 'pervasively sexual'
but right now i feel like an apple macbook power adaptor cable that isn't long enough to extend from a 'nearby' outlet to a preferred workspace
i want to kill myself sometimes; almost entirely on weekends
i feel curious if my anxiety derives from something metaphysical or if i induce it myself, consciously, or subconsciously, or using a type of reasoning inaccessible to current knowledge of the mind
when i was younger i performed a solo dance routine on stage in front of a group of people, then six years later saw the same choreography performed by a group of children more than ten years younger than me and felt okay but kind of betrayed
i think this led to me becoming an 'atheist', in that everything in the universe that happened previous to me becoming an atheist contributed to my eventual atheism
sarcasm doesn't extend to most regions of castellano that i am familiar with
seems like 'impending doom' is the most concrete abstraction i regularly access
last night i had a dream that steve jobs had a presentation in downtown los angeles, and i felt aware and calm that he was dead, and about death in general
i woke up and felt horrified and prophetic and that something must be done and someone must be informed but felt unsure who or why or about what
the service staff where i am living seems considerable more well-adjusted than i feel
it seems like here would be the appropriate place to advertise 'cornflakes'
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